I’ve been really neglecting my own health in the new year! It is hard to admit out loud, but I have been spread so paper thin. When I look back over the last few weeks I can see how this post was inevitable.
I could give you lots of good excuses. Insert: who cares what was consuming me…there is no excuse that trumps my need to keep self care on my to-do list!
My clients, family and friends are well feed, and they leave yoga and boxing inspired. They know I care, it shows in the food, the clean house, the dharma talks, and while I am great at practicing what I preach; mostly, I have been putting me last way too often in the last 3 months.
“Wait What?!…Ursula- Last!” I hear it echo in my mind. It makes me angry! I know better! I mediate, I read to improve myself daily, I, I, I was going though the motions like a zombie… I was disengaged, overbooked, canceling wants and allowing energy drains to squash my spirit.
I woke on my birthday last week…Sad.
“I feel like a used towel…completely wrung out!” I told Sher.
This is the exact opposite of what I teach as wellness ,and a good example of how giving more than you’ve got can be a real drain and wreck your health.
I had to SLOW DOWN…I had to quit thinking about it-teaching about it and just DO it!
This weekend it came to an end and I invited myself to care for me, by no doing of my own I was off work with FREE Time!!!
I was finally forced to let go, and regroup.
My 3 year old was sick and I had to cancel my vacation home.
In those minutes holding with the airline…I asked myself “Are you anywhere in the realm of feeling your core desires?!?!”
I was not Calm, Secure or Free.
Exhausted, that was an understatement. I was rushing, eating junk food (when I was eating at all) and my workouts (personal workouts) were less time then ever before. This trip was supposed to be my escape!!! Now what?
I resisted, screamed, wined and felt sorry for myself. #unproductive
After my mini meltdown I put on my big girl panties and decided to have a staycation.
Amazing Saturday night with Sheridan, 15+extra minutes cuddling in bed this am, (like we slept in until 7am!) art projects with my sweet Aliyah, a 4+ mile run Sunday in the beautiful breeze, good nutrition and it is as if I was reborn!
Sometimes plans change…they do lots of the time around here…and I am learning something BIG we just have to lean in to the life we are getting.
Leaning in means-
Be grateful for what you have now…before that is gone too! Manifest your own destiny with an attitude of gratitude adjustment.
It is rare to have a Monday off to cook, plan my world take over, blog and play…I could get used to it! I’m making an effort to get used to it!
The morning hour practice has been on my todo list for a while now, so in an effort to steal back time I am getting up an hour earlier then everyone at home to just love me! When I was young and single I had time to engage in lots of mecentric fun. If you are young and/or single…RUN and SEE it all, do it all, be all in yourself!!!!
If you are a spouse, mommy, business owner…take your hour…rise and shine…then grind!!! I’m sure the universe will fill some of that time with hiccups, but at least we won’t be overwhelmed when we have no extra time at all.
Start your day inviting in gratitude and how you want to feel! I am a better me to all concerned when I do this! More Sunrises and more surprises await us all!!!
I feel Calm, Secure and Free.